A pound of flesh
The cost of transsexual health care in Canada

“One of the great myths of our culture is that at birth each infant can be identified as distinctly ‘male’ or ‘female’ (biological sex), will grow up to have correspondingly ‘masculine’ or ‘feminine’ behavior (public gender), live as a ‘man’ or a ‘woman’ (social gender role), and marry a woman or a man (heterosexual affective orientation). This is not so… A significant number of people in fact do not fit this simple idea of biological gender destiny.” — Lisa Josephine Lees, Gender: Exploring Diversity and Acceptance
Yesterday I received a long-awaited item in the mail: an application package for admittance to the Gender Identity Clinic at the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health in Toronto. This is the golden ticket for Canadian transsexuals who are in need of medical care (including hormones, surgeries and counselling) and who can’t afford to pay for it themselves. Toronto’s Centre for Addiction and Mental Health, commonly referred to as CAMH, is the gateway to it all.
Many provinces, including British Columbia, Saskatchewan, Manitoba and Ontario, require that transsexuals seeking government-funded medical care be assessed at this Toronto clinic by a team of doctors who are considered to be experts in the field of gender identity. With their stamp of approval and recommendation for surgery (both are required and can take years to receive), most provinces will fund all or part of the cost of all or some of the procedures the patient needs. It’s an elite program from which 90 per cent of applicants were reportedly turned away between 1969 and 1984. Evidence suggests that they have made few changes to their methods or approach since then.
I’ve been wondering for months what I have to do to be one of the lucky few. I don’t know for certain; like everything else related to transsexuality, no one seems to know for certain – not my doctors, not other transsexuals and not my health minister.
Guided only by rumours and the accounts of transsexuals who have been through this process, I have had to machete my own way through the neglected undergrowth of transsexual health care in Canada.
Regarding Caitlin
The first thing I pull from the package from CAMH is a letter. The letter is addressed to me, Calvin. But in the subject line I see written in bold, RE: Caitlin. I assume that they got this name from my endocrinologist when he made the referral, and seeing it makes me uneasy. That name has no place there since it’s neither my legal name nor my chosen name. It’s a name I haven’t used in years.
I’m a guy now. I have a flat chest and a beard, and according to my birth certificate I was born Calvin Neufeld, a boy. I don’t even have female reproductive organs anymore; that was the price I had to pay for the birth certificate. More on that later.
There is only one thing left for me to do before my transition is complete: genital reconstruction. It’s a relatively straightforward procedure for male-to-female transsexuals (in effect, turning an outie into an innie) but a considerably more challenging undertaking for female-to-male transsexuals. Complete genital reconstruction is typically achieved through several surgeries over several years. The entire procedure is high-risk and costly, with generally unimpressive (and often impotent) results.
It sounds crude and insane, I know. But when you don’t know what it’s like to have sex with your wife, when you have to hide in the men’s change room for fear of becoming a victim of violence, when you’re terrified of being left to die by a shocked emergency crew, when half of your body still feels like someone else’s, even the poorest of options becomes palatable.
I want to feel as complete as I can, now that I know it’s possible. My face, my voice, my chest – even the gut that showed up at around the same time that my butt disappeared – they’re all mine. I finally know what it’s like to look at my body without surprise. What I had before always felt foreign.
Hormones get most of the credit for my transformation – small doses of a clear, thick, yellow fluid that requires a large needle, a steady hand, and a deep intramuscular injection every week for the rest of my life. Thankfully, my wife gets a kick out of giving shots.
But hormones only change secondary sexual characteristics. From the beginning I knew I wanted my transition to be complete, and to be completed quickly so that I could get on with my life with as little awkward androgyny as possible.
My surgical corrections began with a hysterectomy and bilateral salpingo-oophorectomy – meaning, in trans terms, that I had all my internal “girl bits” taken out. It wasn’t my first priority (that had always been chest reconstruction) but it was the only procedure I could access under provincial health care, and only through a loophole. It took some investigation to find a sympathetic gynecologist on the other side of the province who would overlook the fact that Ontario had not yet re-listed sexual reassignment surgeries. (It was announced in May 2008 that, after a 10-year hiatus, the procedures would again be considered medically necessary procedures under Ontario’s health care plan.)
“As long as your health card says you’re female,” said the gynecologist (my first and only), “it won’t be a problem.” She is a leading surgeon in her field and a Mother Teresa to trans men like me. Without the procedure, I would not have been allowed to change the sex designation on my birth certificate, leading to some awkward (if not dangerous) moments at hospitals or airports with my mismatched ID.
It was an experience I don’t regret – in fact, I am grateful for it. My uterus was an organ I had no desire to use and under the influence of high doses of testosterone over long periods of time it could have killed me. What I do regret is that I did it on someone else’s terms, to satisfy some random, meaningless criterion for legal sexual status.
Two months later, while still recovering from the hysterectomy, I managed to raise the $8,000 I needed to remove the breasts I had been painfully strapping down under my clothes, day after agonizing day. There were rumours that the provincial funding of sexual reassignment was forthcoming, but even once the funding was restored we were promised at least a two-year waiting list – and only if we happened to be approved by CAMH staff first. I knew I couldn’t endure several more years of the suffocating binding and back pain, and turning away from my wife when getting changed. It was more than a medical necessity for me; it was the most liberating experience of my life.
Today, with the help of the hormones, the hysto, and the “top surgery,” I move unquestioned and unobstructed as a male in the world. But I’m not yet complete. There is one last surgical process that I need to undergo, but for lack of the tens of thousands of dollars needed to pay for it myself, the only way I can get it is through the narrow gateway of the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health.
The conditions of application
The letter from the CAMH introduces an attached questionnaire and informs me that they are requesting “a written life story regarding your gender identity issues and two photographs (one crossdressed, if possible).” Should I be admitted to the program, they tell me that I can expect to undergo assessment on an out-patient basis at their clinic, where I will be interviewed by two psychiatrists, a psychologist and an endocrinologist, and will undergo “a complete physical examination, and possibly [be] asked to undergo psychological testing.” I’m picturing myself on a glass slide under a human-sized microscope, a medical oddity squirming under their clinical gaze.
The questionnaire they sent is all but impossible for me to fill out, both practically and ethically: half of the questions don’t apply to me, and half conflict with my sense of integrity.
Since they begin by asking only my Name on Birth Certificate, Sex as on Birth Certificate, and Name Used, they don’t seem to have later-stage transsexuals like me in mind, whose birth certificate reveals none of the information they want. Throughout the questionnaire, the language they use forces me to picture myself as a middle-aged lawyer trying on his wife’s panties on the weekend in order to come up with an answer that fits the question.
Some of the questions seem routine. Others make me wince. They want to know all the jobs I’ve ever had that lasted longer than a year. My income. A sexual history (Please give details). Do I have kids? Followed by, At what age did these desires begin?
How can I squeeze my story through these slots? How can I remember when “these desires” began when my childhood memories are of Calvin – from Watterson’s comic strip – not of Caitlin. Or perhaps some androgynous hybrid of the two. I don’t even have blond hair, but my memories are of Calvin, doing the things I did, saying the things I said, playing with the stuffed tiger I made myself and digging up dinosaur bones in the backyard. It’s not what others saw, but it’s what I saw, or what I wished to see. I don’t remember a girlhood. And I don’t remember when that began.
Next, the questionnaire asks me whether I have “dressed in clothes of the opposite sex (crossdressed).” And at what age did I do it first? Then, at what age did I begin crossdressing occasionally? Frequently? Continuous crossdressing at home? Continuous crossdressing outside home? Full-time cross-living? And date when full-time living and working in the opposite gender role began.
I can’t even halfway bend my mind through the loops of what counts as crossdressing for me, versus what counted before, if it counted, and how often I did it, when and where. Not to mention the curious misuse of the term “gender role” in this context, as though I’d gone from dishwashing to chainsawing.
The last part to this particular string of questioning asks me to list previous attempts to get medical care for this condition. I’m given two lines for my answer. I could fill two pages.
Still, they give me plenty of response space to list details of every suicide attempt. And confessions of self-mutilation. My psychiatric history. Have I used alcoholic beverages? Describe quantity and circumstances of intake. Oh, and describe the size, shape, and function of my sex organs. Now I need a drink.
Finally, they want to know the name, birthplace, age, address, and marital status of my mother, father, brothers and sisters (living and deceased) including step- and half-siblings.
I’ve never had to tell this much to anyone.
Meanwhile, south of the border
On June 17, 2008, the American Medical Association called for the removal of financial barriers to health care for transsexuals by passing Resolution 122. The resolution asserted the need for “public and private health insurance coverage for treatment of gender identity disorder as recommended by the patient’s physician.” The resolution affirms the effectiveness of medical treatment for transsexuals and emphasizes that Gender Identity Disorder is a serious medical condition which, if left untreated, “can result in clinically significant psychological distress, dysfunction, debilitating depression and, for some people without access to appropriate medical care and treatment, suicidality and death.”
The resolution also states that the American Medical Association, along with the World Professional Association for Transgender Health and other health experts in Gender Identity Disorder, “have rejected the myth that such treatments are “˜cosmetic’ or “˜experimental’ and have recognized that these treatments can provide safe and effective treatment for a serious health condition.”
It is hard for me not to compare this to my experience of Canadian transsexual health care – the blind investigation, the awkward questions to inexperienced health care providers (and their receptionists), the bureaucracy of the Office of the Registrar General, the white lies and rogue doctors and long-distance travel, and the endless efforts to explain myself to a head-turning or head-shaking public in the absence of reliable statistical or medical data. In the distraction of medical controversy, religious debate, media carnivals, prejudice and tradition, the immediate well-being of transsexuals is being neglected. While the world decides what to make of us and whether we are in our right minds or deluded, we remain socially ostracized and without the medical care that we consider appropriate to our needs.
But the fact remains that, according to Ontario’s Ministry of Health, I am legally entitled to government-funded medical care for treatment of gender identity disorder. What I don’t have is access to that treatment, and the barriers extend well beyond the financial. I’ve had to fight and cheat and lie my way to the care that I needed – even when I had to pay for it myself – and now I’m being asked to trade my secrets and my dignity to get the rest. If I’m lucky.
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27 Comments
This article helps me greatly toward a greater understanding of what a friend of mine is going through. I must say, as much as I loved him and still love her, I can’t get away from the fact that what she’s doing is self-destructive, because there’s no debate that no amount of exogenous hormones or surgeries can replace the functions of our sex organs once they’re gone. Terms like “sex change,” “reassignment” and “trans” are somewhat misleading—I would never deny anyone their right to express themselves in whatever gender they feel and to change their outward appearance to match it, but it’s simply not possible to turn an x chromosome into a y chromosome, or vice versa.
From Barry Davis on Mar 5th, 2009 at 7:36am
Barry, I don’t know the exact science behind it, but many people are also born ‘intersexed’, as in, with both male & female reproductive organs. So for many I think it’s not as simple as just ‘switching chromosomes’. Are there are others reading this who can better comment here?
From Lynette on Mar 20th, 2009 at 1:55pm
Good blog read, hope the people at CAMH don’t see it. They hate people speaking out about their practices. When you do go to CAMH just be yourself, and when you fill out that form, cross out and fix any thing that has the wrong name on it.
Just wanted to correct a few things and add a few others to your well written article.
Actually B.C. has it’s own system, they no longer use CAMH, haven’t for years now.
Sort of true. The process, though much easier and with less complications is a lot more then turning a outie to an innie. There are several types of procedures done by various surgeons for the women.
Patients in B.C., Alberta under their own health care system do not have to pay upfront for their procedures in Montreal. They do however have to pay for their way there and any stay before and after they are released from the clinic.
Before the re listing in Ontario, patients in Ontario had to find their own way to the U.K. and pay for all extra out of hospital costs. At that time Ontario was using two U.K. surgeons for funding even though the Montreal clinic was there.
Funny for the typical self felt female, cross dressing is permissable since now adays girls wear pants more so then dresses.
I suspect CAMH, cause this is what they ask parents who have sadly fallen into their hands because they may have a child who is transexual: Is your child playing with girl toys or boy toys?/ Does your child play with boys or girls? They are really that backword in thinking.
And worse is the gender section for adults is housed in the same section/same floor as sex offenders.
—————————————————————————————Ok the rest is for the first person who commented.
[i].Ok how is what “your friend” is doing self destructive? If your friend didn’t correct he body then self destructive is truly what she would then end up being.
Sex organs? You mean the brain cause if you did you’d be right. But of course you mean those parts which doctors at birth, and other people use as a way to classify someone (with no clothes on) at first glance. A woman who is transexual will have a fully functional vagina, orgasms and all. Sadly for the men more work needs to be done. Now if you mean reproductively speaking, well sadly that part is true science hasn’t yet made it that far. However if you are using one’s reproductive ability as part of definition, what about those who are infertile for whatever reason?
True the term sex change is misleading the term most use now is correction. The person is correcting their genitals to match their brain, which can not be changed. So people use words like gender confirmation surgery, sex corrective surgery, genital reassignment surgery and others like that to define what really is happening.
Not sure what your issue with trans is though.
[/i][i]
Well that’s awfully white of you to allow people the right to express themselves. What about allowing people the right to correct their body so they can get on with life and lead a fully enjoyable productive life, as you can do now?
As for the old, and it is old, chromosome argument I suggest you start doing more learning about how much, or how much it doesn’t, chromosomes have as to identifying one’s gender. Did you know that right now there are people walking around out there living their lives, and have been since birth unknowingly, with according to you the wrong chromosomes? Yep that’s right there are women walking around out there right now, some may have even been in your grade school, high school class room, with xy chromosomes. And in a vise versa way same for some men.
Then there are some people that have three, not two, chromosomes.
And even more, what about people born intersex? These children who are forced assigned at birth a sex the doctor thinks is best for that child. I know one woman who thought she was transexual, and in some ways she was, because at birth the doctor thought he would “fix” her. She was born intersex, the doctor forced assigned her male and so this woman was forced to live a life of confusion, a brain saying one thing and a body looking the other. She learned of her past infant surgery after the fact, after she had corrected her body as an adult.
So you see it really isn’t so cut and dried is it?[/i]
From femme on Mar 20th, 2009 at 5:06pm
The brain can be changed, but there’s no need for it to be, is more like it.
From Tyciol on Mar 31st, 2009 at 3:34pm
brother that was beautifully written. And I so know what you mean. I had to fill out that dehumanizing form too and my first appt. is in July. The questions are so intrusive and degrading.
I’ve been binding for years now, on T for two (lol), and I am agonizing over yet another hot hot summer in a binder. At least in the winter, if I am just running an errand where I know I’ll be out mostly and won’t ever need to take off the jacket, I will sometimes go without the binder, for a break, because sometimes I just can’t get enough air into me (asthma) and the binder just makes it that much harder to bear.If I could qualify for a loan, I’d just do it that way and not even bother with CAMH, as I don’t think I will be opting for ‘bottom surgery’ anyway. I feel like it would be easier for me to make the 6 thou after “top surgery” than before. But as it stands, I am at CAMH’s mercy.
What happens after/if I am approved is troubling me as well. Because I have already had the consult with the surgeon that I would like to perform the procedure. He’s right here in Toronto, but it’s my understanding that we’ll all have to go to the clinic in montreal. How is that cost effective, when there’s a surgeon in Ontario (toronto) who has a lot of experience with the procedure?
Ug. I feel like I’m losing my mind.
From JJ on Apr 9th, 2009 at 7:02pm
JJ, I don’t know whether you will be forced to undergo top surgery in Montreal if you get the approval for funding (there isn’t much precedent, if any, for OHIP-funded FTM top surgery). Reports of people who have received funding since it was relisted indicate that people are indeed being sent to Montreal, but the cases I’m aware of are just trans women so far. The best advice I can give, which is painfully inadequate, is to keep plugging away and try to insist that they use the TO surgeon. This might delay things but it could be precedent-setting for other trans men. I think if you did this you would also get lots of community support to change the policy. If your surgeon also costs less than the Montreal surgery that might also help your case. But the final decision lies in the wrong hands, I’m sorry to say.
The binders are suffocating. I sympathize. The surgery will change your life. If you feel like you’re losing your mind right now, I can at least reassure you that – if your experience is anything like mine – you will get both your mind and your life back with surgery.
Good luck. Keep fighting for your rights and your needs.
From Calvin on Apr 13th, 2009 at 1:31pm
Hey Calvin, thanks for your response. I don’t even know if I can stand to wait as long as it takes for approval, and to have to wait on top of that through a waiting list at the surgery clinic itself (in montreal) is too much for me. And I’m pretty adamant about not seeing Brassard in Montreal. I want who I want, and he’s far far less costly than Brassard. I have written to a couple of members of the Rainbow Health Coalition who are apparently teamed up with the Sherbourne Health Centre in some way. I know SHC is trying to negotiate with CAMH some sort of power sharing in the decision making for surgery approvals, but these talks are long, tedious, and bogged down by those ego clashing and unwilling to let go of their “power”. Meanwhile….back at that ranch…time’s a ticking away for me.
See, I started my transition quite late in life. Took me about 7 or 8 years to find a doctor who would put me on T.
I’ve experienced a period for longer than most transmen I know who have had the top surgery already, have been alive! 30 years to be precise, and I only stopped having my period a few months after starting on T…..so I am only coming up on my 2 year, bleed free anniversary in July. I’ve always looked “boyish”, and there’s some evidence that I’m actually inter-sexed, but that is hard to prove, especially later in life although I know I had high levels of testosterone naturally. Allopathic medicine has narrowly defined tests to indicate inter-sexism in later life, but given my history, and the things I endured as a young child from my own mother, it is highly suggestive of inter-sexism. If I could prove that, I would be able to give CAMH and everyone else in my way, the middle finger, because line 18 of appendix D of approved procedures, clearly states that those seeking Gender Assignment surgeries, as opposed to those seeking Gender Re-assignment (line 17) do not require prior approval from the ministry, nor do they have to endure the dehumanization of CAMH and it’s bloody degrading process. If I could find a doctor who would support that, I might not have to wait as long. Either way, I’m not seeing Brassard.
I want to enjoy my chest before I’m a senior citizen! And the doctor I have seen is quite skilled and believes he can do it with minimal scarring, which would mean quicker recovery, which is more important at my (delicate…LOL) age. All for less money.
But as it stands now, the prospect of another hot summer strapped down is wearing me down. But for as long as I breathing, I’ll keep fighting. I just feel so exhausted from the “fights” sometimes.
Thanks again Calvin, for writing that piece. You have probably opened more eyes than you know.
From JJ on Apr 15th, 2009 at 7:41pm
Calvin and JJ,
My name is Desiree, I’m 18 and feel as if I have been living in a girls body my whole life but am a boy. Ever since i can remember I always tried to be a boy…all through elementary school i was teased for looking like one, even in high school too. I graduate high school this June and I feel as if im ready for a change. I’m not happy this way. Im dating a Girl but secretly cuz im afraid of what my family will say. She already believes im a boy, just because of the way I am..she’s a great supporter and i’d love to be her husband one day. I don’t really want to have a Genital operation, as this actually scares me quite a bit… and I can live without having a penis, theres other ways right!? but as for my top half, i am constantly trying to hide my chest. My hair is extremely short( of course no facial hair)..but would liek it. I made an apt to speak with my dr tomorrow about how i feel. Like i said, i dont really want to undergo any surgerys…maybe one to get rid of my female organs, but as for putting a penis on me, it just seems like it is a dangerous process not to mention im going to school next year and am broke. any tips on how i could deal with things?? I just want to be comfortable and happy and I havnt been ever since i was a VERY young child..my aunt recently said she is gay…and i know i am too, but theres more then that..im not happy being a girl, i dont feel as if i belong in a girl body. I already go by Jason and have met many people who think i am a boy already and I wish to keep it that way!.Havn’t talked to anyone about this, but am ready to …thanks guys!
From Des on May 6th, 2009 at 12:02pm
Jason, the truth (a matter which I take seriously) is that you’re not crazy. You have nothing to hide or feel ashamed about. How you feel is very real. You have a medical condition that the medical profession is capable of diagnosing and treating. You deserve medical care. You deserve understanding. You deserve to be treated with respect. You deserve to live a life of quality and happiness. You are the only one who knows exactly what you need to do to feel well. Do it. Proudly.
From Calvin on May 6th, 2009 at 2:49pm
Thanks Calvin,
I went to the Drs yesterday and talked with him. he said to me that we will wait till mid summer then start hormone treatments. Could I ask you, what are the effects of having hormones? I also told my grandma last night, she surprisingly sat there and said, we all already figured that out. it made things a lot easier. I have a few questions for u and maybe u could help me out….
1) How can i “hide” my chest for the time being
2) if i choose not to have any reconstructive surgery “down there”…is it ever possible to have my sex changed on my ID?
I just feel right now i would never be able to have such a surgery..and to be honest, i doubt i’d ever have the money ha ha. Its nice to talk to someone who is in the same situation as me, or at least who has been. I never thought that i’d be able to fully do this, but since i’ve talked to my dr and family, i feel so much better and that i’ll actually get to be who I want to be:)
J
From Jason on May 8th, 2009 at 8:17am
Hey Jason,
Don’t know if you are still coming back here, but I thought I’d answer a couple of your questions.
Firstly, regarding bottom surgery, many many guys don’t ever bother getting any form of bottom surgery, even if they get a hysterectomy. Right now, I am not considering either, although I may be putting myself at risk, because of the testosterone, though it’s debatable whether it’s a necessary procedure for all transguys.
For me the only surgery I want is the top surgery. And yes, you can indeed get your sex changed on your ID without having those surgeries. It depends on the doctor, and while I don’t want to say it here, there are “ways” around getting your ID changed without having a surgery that is specifically a sex assignment surgery. But if you decide to get a hysterectomy, you can then change your ID, without even having top or bottom surgery. It depends on how much your doctor is willing to help you.
As for hiding your chest, whatever you do, please don’t use an ace bandage. You can find binders made specifically for your needs on the internet. Use search terms FTM and binder and you’ll see a number of different makers. And if you are handy with a sewing machine you can make your own. The material most often used for binders is called powernet, or sometimes powerknit. It’s a stretchy fabric that comes in the usual undergarment colours, nude (caucasian) , white and black. You can find this material rather cheaply on ebay.
Neoprene back braces are another alternative and cheaper than most binders, but are hot and sweaty and nearly impossible to wear in the summer. There is also a guy on ebay who had gynecomastia (man breasts) and decided to make his own chest binders. He has since had surgery, but still makes them, and I have seen positive feedback from transguys who have bought his product. It basically looks like an undershirt, only its made of that powerknit or net material.
If money is an issue, you can use the Big Brothers Binder program once (do a google search), where very well kept used binders are sent to a transguy who then sends them out to FtMs in need for about the cost of postage. But make sure if you use that program to follows his rules to the letter, or you will be SOL.
Finally, I don’t know where you are writing from, but if it happens to be close to toronto, there is an FtM support group that meets every friday night at the 519 community centre.
good luck Jason,
JJ
From JJ on May 16th, 2009 at 7:12am
just to be clear, I meant it’s debatable whether a hysterectomy is necessary for all transguys, although I’m also a lot older than you are and didn’t start T until I was 42, so a hysterectomy may be more of an issue for you, if you get on a testosterone regimen, because you will be using it during your most fertile times. So it’s something you should discuss with a sympathetic doctor. Preferably someone with a lot of experience with FtM care.
From JJ on May 16th, 2009 at 7:28am
Hey JJ,
ya im still comin back, haha actually i get emails reminding me to come back n check. thanks for your help, it answered a lot of my questions. My Doc is pretty good, in fact..he basically sat down in front of me last time i was in and just talked to me about how im feeling. And im in ontario..niagara falls to be exact…so not exactly to close to toronto, which sucks:S
I will check out the binder things also, cuz im currently using a backbrace..but ive heard its not a healthy thing to do?And its difficult to find drs around here who have dealt with my “situation” so to speak..so hopefully things work out well…
just a question- how expensive is the t? ive heard different things ..basically that its not expensive at all, but i wanna be sure.
From Jason on May 19th, 2009 at 3:34pm
I am having some trouble finding Binders….its kinda gettin frustrating..since i Don’t own a credit card and im basically broke since im finishin high school n don’t have much money:(
From Jason on May 19th, 2009 at 9:25pm
Yeah. It’s hard getting anywhere without a credit card. The only other thing I can suggest, is if you have a chequing account, you can get a Paypal account that way, and make purchases through Paypal. A back brace isn’t the greatest, but it’s better than an ace bandage.
I know the Big Brothers Binder program takes Paypal, so check them out.
As for t, depending on if the pharmacy is willing to waive the dispensing charge, a bottle is roughly 30-40 bucks and will last you 2-3 months depending on your dose.
From JJ on May 22nd, 2009 at 7:13am
here’s the link to the big brothers program. they take money orders too.
If you end up using the program…, seriously……make sure you follows his instructions to the letter, or else you will end up SOL. He’s pretty strict with his conditions. It’s unfortunate he’s felt the need to be so hard core, but I appreciate what he’s trying to do. And I’m well aware that “no good deed goes unpunished”, so I can relate to his frustrations.for less than 15 bucks, you’ll end up with a used, but very decent binder.
From JJ on May 22nd, 2009 at 7:48am
i sent in an order the other day..im hoping it’ll get processed.
From Jason on May 22nd, 2009 at 10:39am
guys just wondering if i could get some advice…I havn’t told my mom my decision yet, or my dad…i think my mom will take it easier then my dad..since he is quite old fashioned..and i was always his “little girl” :S. how should i Go about it..
From Jason on Jun 2nd, 2009 at 10:18pm
With confidence, Jason. And, of course, compassion.
As for medical questions, it is true that most doctors have limited knowledge of transsexual health care. Sherbourne Health Centre has developed clinical guidelines for trans primary health care. You can download the guidelines at the link below and bring them to your doctor. Your doctor will probably be thrilled to have them:
From Calvin on Jun 5th, 2009 at 9:08am
Hey Calvin,
I just had my intake, and wow, the form was invasive enough, but the questions I was asked in person, were out of this world. And back into the ’50s, I felt. Or imagined, since this particular version of “me” has not lived in the 1950’s. It was how I imagined it would be if I had.
From anon on Jul 15th, 2009 at 7:59pm
Hello,
If I may, an unrelated question to what’s being discussed here. Here & elsewhere I’m always struck by people who complain saying, ‘I have to drive all the way from Niagara Falls to Toronto’, or wherever. Reality is, the majority of Canadians live a lot further than that, if in fact they can even find someone to see. There are transgendered people in northern Sask, rural New Brunswick and Wawa Ont, too. I can’t find a gender therapist outside Van, TO, or Ottawa (and a few others)
I never thought I’d see the day when medical treatment is more accessible and cheaper in Bangkok than it is in Canada. I digress – sorry. Does anyone know if there is an updated list of gender therapists who are geared to helping the ‘unwashed masses’ outside the major population centers.
I’m a transitioning woman and nearing the stage where I’ve gone as far as I can on my own. I’m starting to come out more and am going to need more professional help.
Also, is there any way to find out if a General Practitioner (GP) is adverse to treating tg people, or whether they are encouraging and supportive. (or just non-committal) It’s a personal thing I know, but I’d like to think the Dr isn’t shaking his head / rolling his eyes as I leave, and is actually on my side.
Any advice is greatly appreciated,
Thanks Joan
From Joan on Oct 7th, 2009 at 7:57pm
Calvin,
Thank you so much for sharing this. I am currently doing a research assignment on Trans Access to Health Care for a Sociology of Health class. Thank you for putting a human voice to my research. I wish you you great luck (unfortunatly “luck” is what it seems to come down to in this process).
Alysse
From alysse k on Nov 18th, 2009 at 10:22pm
I’m an MtF trying to get hormones without going to that horrid place, because quite frankly: it scares the life out of me. I live too far away from it to be helpful, and I have undergone enough ridicule for being TG to subject myself to the degrading process of trying to pass without hormones. I’m only 25, so if I really, REALLY tried I could pass, however I believe that we trans deserve a bit of dignity after all the crap we go through in our childhood.
I have a friend in the US who started hormones 2 years ago, yesterday she was in Thailand for her SRS. 2 years! That’s just unbelievable and I’m so green with envy that I haven’t been able to talk to her without sinking into depression and angst.
Canadian transsexuals deserve better than this, we aren’t sex offenders, we aren’t ‘freaks’ and we don’t deserve to be paraded around like carnival sideshows.
From Dianna on Mar 18th, 2010 at 6:49am
Hey Calvin!
I just started my transition and am hoping to start T in the coming months. I Thought that you wrote a very interesting and informative article.
I was hoping to get more information on your hysterectomy because like you i have been thinking of opting for that surgery first so that i can have my gender markers changed right off the bat.
The problem i’ve been having is that i have been having is that there is barely any information about the costs of hysterectomies and if they are government funded or what not.
I’m currently living in Ontario with OHIP but I am also covered with Quebec healthcare as well.
I was hoping that maybe you could point me in the right direction to resources so I can get on the right path.
many thanks
Stephane
From Stephane on Jun 23rd, 2010 at 6:06pm
I find this comment very troubling: “The entire procedure is high-risk and costly, with generally unimpressive (and often impotent) results.” It’s true that genital surgeries are high risk (and costly!), but to generalize about results that are “unimpressive” and “impotent” not only makes judgments about others’ bodies but spreads misinformation about the surgical advances that have been made in the last decade. Metoidioplasties and centurions retain erectile tissue and depending on what one is born with can be used to achieve some degree of penetration, and even in the last 18 months there have been significant improvements in the types of implants and pumps used for phalloplasty.
In my experience many people who hold negative opinions such as those expressed above – even when the people articulating those positions themselves want lower surgery – are based on understandings of surgery that are out of date and have not done a lot of research into what contemporary surgery can provide. I know many men who have had genital surgery, are extremely satisfied (as are their partners), and who either refuse to talk about or share their results online because of the judgment other trans men make about their bodies, and some who have simply severed all ties from the “trans community” for the same reason. (I count myself among these men.) In order for us to honestly discuss the drawbacks and benefits of what will for many be one of the most important medical decisions of their/our lives, it’s important to have access to folks who’ve been through it, and when comments as “generally unimpressive” abound it alienates the people who have firsthand, invaluable knowledge. That was a disappointing line in an otherwise good essay.
From E. on Jul 6th, 2010 at 5:08pm
A wonderful piece. I am currently going through the shit part of the beginning of my transition, only started hormones recently and saving up for chest surgery. I wonder though if the hysterectomy is covered, I wouldn’t know. My female organs have caused me nothing but pain throughout my life, psychological and physical. Unfortunately for me, it was never enough to have something seriously wrong so they could remove them. And as crazy as it may seem, I had always wished they’d find a tumor so they could remove my ‘inner bits’.
It’s very depressing to read the truth of Canada’s ridiculous transgender policies. Not to mention that technically we are not protected from discrimination. Having to live with the fact that people see who I am as some sort of disorder. I remember going to CAMH and meeting Dr. Zucker. I remember the way he looked at me, the terrifying feeling from only a moments glance. My mother and I had agreed that only from hearing his voice on the phone that he didn’t seem like he’d be much help. There was something (excuse my language) douchey about him. I laughed when I first said it but after the experience of being in that clinic I could no longer laugh. It was a painful experience. They tried to convince me that I was depressed and making up a false identity.
I remember CAMH telling me I should bring my entire family even though I wasn’t out to all of them. They tried to force me into telling them, trying to find many different ways so this could be some big family outting which even my mom thought was ridiculous. Forcing me into a situation that could be really bad, especially if my dad had kicked me out.
Anyways, this was an amazing piece, just had to comment on it. Not sure why I shared my experience but ugh CAMH and having to go through them to get covered is just ridiculous.
From Parker Valentine on Nov 6th, 2010 at 2:08am
Hi folks, lots of good comments and questions here. If anyone wants to contact me personally for advice or support, you can email caljn at yahoo dot com.
From Calvin on Nov 9th, 2010 at 1:23pm